Many people—in particular, many leaders—think that respect is something other people owe them. But in truth, of course, respect must be earned. If you feel you aren’t getting the level of respect you’d like from those you’re leading, here are some strategies to help foster respect:
Be your authentic self. People can tell when someone is not being authentic, and they quickly lose respect. Be sure you’re bringing your genuine self and that you’re being transparent about who you are, because transparency breeds trust and trust leads to respect. Authenticity makes sure the respect you receive is grounded in who you are.
Give respect. Respect is a two-way street, and the best way to gain respect is to learn to give it. When you have respect for others you can be more effective in helping them grow and develop. In every relationship, treat others the way you would wish to be treated.
Practice self-awareness. Self-awareness can lead you to see the weaknesses you have in yourself, which in turn can lead you to have more compassion for others. And compassion bolsters respect. Self-awareness gives you the capacity to learn from your mistakes as well as your successes. It enables you to keep growing.
Find ways to help others grow. It doesn’t make sense to hire capable people and then tell them what to do and how to do it. The most highly respected leaders are those who help others grow and make space for them to flourish. The greatest success for leaders is helping others succeed.
Be vulnerable. There is a false belief that vulnerability in a leader shows weakness. On the contrary, admitting as a leader that you are human and you can make mistakes shows that you respect yourself and those around you enough to be honest. Vulnerability is the true strength.
Show appreciation for others. One of the easiest ways to earn respect is to show appreciation and recognition for those who work hard and put in a strong effort. Conversely, one of the fastest ways to lose respect is to withhold appreciation and praise.
Be consistent in word and deed. if you say one thing and do something else, it’s easy for others to lose respect for you. The most respected leaders are reliable in what they say and do. They’re trustworthy and consistent in every setting, in every group of people.
Communicate often. People want to be communicated with—they want to know what’s happening, especially where their livelihood is concerned—and they will respect you and make time to listen if you are faithful in providing frequent updates and feedback. When leaders fail to communicate, people get frustrated and lose respect.
Learn to respect yourself. Before you can give something, you must own it yourself. You need to learn to respect yourself before you can expect others to respect you. Respect yourself and those around you, and they will respect you in turn.
Bottom line, if you want your employees to trust you, you need to first understand yourself and then show them respect, communicating honestly and demonstrating that you’re worthy of their trust.
Lead from within: How people treat other people is often a direct reflection of how they feel about themselves.
#1 N A T I O N A L B E S T S E L L E R
The Leadership Gap
What Gets Between You and Your Greatness
After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.
Additional Reading you might enjoy:
- 12 Successful Leadership Principles That Never Grow Old
- A Leadership Manifesto: A Guide To Greatness
- How to Succeed as A New Leader
- 12 of The Most Common Lies Leaders Tell Themselves
- 4 Proven Reasons Why Intuitive Leaders Make Great Leaders
- The One Quality Every Leader Needs To Succeed
- The Deception Trap of Leadership
Photo Credit: istockphoto
Of Lolly’s many awards and accolades, Lolly was designated a Top-50 Leadership and Management Expert by Inc. magazine. Huffington Post honored Lolly with the title of The Most Inspiring Woman in the World. Her writing has appeared in HBR, Inc.com, Fast Company (Ask The Expert), Huffington Post, and Psychology Today, and others. Her newest book, The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness has become a national bestseller.
Bill Dougherty
10. May, 2020
Lolly,
I retired at 78 years old….since then, I pretty much read everything you write, and send it along to my 40 year old son. He graduated college and all went down hill from there for the last 20 years….however, he has found himself, and because of the good company he is working for, has found respect. Something he has missed since attending a private high school. Where he played footBall and LaCrosse And was a captain on each team.
He graduated college as the first one on my side of the family, however, it was not a pleasant experience. He did it, in large part, for Mom And Dad!
Drugs, booze, and the wrong associations followed him for 20 years.
He has avoided all of that for the past two years, and has received accolades from his present company, and has entered the management program at 40 years of age. He is extremely well accepted, and well liked by all his peers.
I sent him your book, and send him articles you write on a steady basis.
Out of all the books I’ve read over the past 50 or so years, yours is the most relevant for those that find themselves in the same situation as my son.
Keep them coming, and I’ll keep forwarding…pretty soon he’ll deal directly with you, as what you communicate speaks directly to him!
He is management material, and with your guidance will find success and fulfilment in that role.
Keep em coming…you are a blessing!
Bill Dougherty- former majority owner/ CEO/Founder of a business that had as clients more than 1,000 Higher Education Institutions over thirty five years in business.
lollydaskal
12. May, 2020
Thank you Bill for your thoughtful message and comment.