The Gift Of Being Present

One of the clients I coach—an important leader in his industry—was extremely distraught and agitated about the future of his company.

I allowed him some space to vent and rant, and then I reminded him how great leaders look at the future, how they create vision and values and culture, and how they create targets based on where they’re going.

But when times are tough, I told him, great leaders are handed a gift.

The gift of being present.

The uncertainty of his current situation meant he could actually take the time to slow down and pay more attention to the present moment and the things he needed to do—helping him make better decisions that would, in turn, have a good effect on his future.

Being present in the moment does not mean we act without direction in the future.

The gift of being present requires intention and practice to carry out new action.

To think, to feel, to impact, we first must be.

Be a Witness: Sometime life is overshadowed by challenging events of our lives. Pause and pay deep attention to what is happening in the given moment.

Focus: Do not allow your thoughts to stray, but instead learn to focus completely on what you are feeling in the moment. Concentrate on getting things done one thing at a time.

Stay Calm:  It can be hard in stressful times, but try to remain calm through the storm. Things might feel overwhelming but know this feeling passes.

Do Better: Take the time to make things better by being reflective and responsive instead of reactive and resentful.

Zoom In: Block all the noise out and zoom in on who you are being. Being present awards you the gift of feeling.

Don’t Do It Alone : The worst thing you can do is think you are alone in this world. Get help, hire a coach, speak to a trusted advisor, invite others to join you on making every moment of today matter.

Often when times are challenging we spend our time thinking about the past or the future.

There’s no magic pill to make the economy turn around, to make business be more lucrative, to bring back customers or valuable employees who are gone.

Being present is not an idea, a mood, a thought: It’s an awareness that is rich with heart and learning.

Lead From Within:  As a heart-based leader, reduce life’s challenges by going deeper within yourself to receive the gifts of being present.

 


 

N A T I O N A L   B E S T S E L L E R
The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

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Additional Reading you might enjoy:

 

Photo Credit: Getty Images


Lolly Daskal is one of the most sought-after executive leadership coaches in the world. Her extensive cross-cultural expertise spans 14 countries, six languages and hundreds of companies. As founder and CEO of Lead From Within, her proprietary leadership program is engineered to be a catalyst for leaders who want to enhance performance and make a meaningful difference in their companies, their lives, and the world.

Of Lolly’s many awards and accolades, Lolly was designated a Top-50 Leadership and Management Expert by Inc. magazine. Huffington Post honored Lolly with the title of The Most Inspiring Woman in the World. Her writing has appeared in HBR, Inc.com, Fast Company (Ask The Expert), Huffington Post, and Psychology Today, and others. Her newest book, The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness has become a national bestseller.

  1. Martina

    25. Jun, 2013

    Great post Lolly. Presence is a gift that we often overlook or race by in our effort and striving to get to somewhere else in life. We put if off, and think there will be another time to enjoy, aontemplate and ruminate about where we are in life at this moment.

    This moment is all there is, and we need to be attendent to it. To our own needs, to the needs of those we care about, and as leaders those we care for.

    Now is all there is. Use it, learn from it. Embrace it.

    Reply to this comment
  2. Panteli Tritchew

    25. Jun, 2013

    Insightful post, Lolly, and great reminder of one our life-long -learning challenges-staying in the moment.

    Your post reminded me of the recent high-wire walk over a section of the Grand Canyon by Nik Wallenda. We’re not all dare-devils to be sure, but staying focused, staying centered, and staying in the moment of *each* step seems critical for any of our own balancing acts. 🙂 Panteli

    Reply to this comment
    • lollydaskal

      25. Jun, 2013

      Panteli

      Great comment.

      ……but staying focused, staying centered, and staying in the moment of *each* step seems critical for any of our own balancing acts.

      Thanks for sharing.

      Reply to this comment
    • lollydaskal

      25. Jun, 2013

      With the past, I have nothing to do; nor with the future. I live now. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

      Reply to this comment
  3. Gerardo

    25. Jun, 2013

    Great Post Lolly. Ithink one of the most difficult things for a leader is, when there’s a storm, to be able to remain focused, and at the same time discerning when he has to intervene or let others do their work.

    Reply to this comment
    • lollydaskal

      25. Jun, 2013

      We’re so caught up in trying to do everything, experience all the essential things, not miss out on anything important..
      we loose sight of what we have right in front of us.

      Our lives would be so much better IF WE JUST STAYED focused on the PRESENT MOMENT because basically that is all we have.

      Reply to this comment
    • lollydaskal

      25. Jun, 2013

      It is very difficult, and for that reason we have stay mindful.

      Reply to this comment
  4. Shandra White Harris

    25. Jun, 2013

    Staying focused, staying present,staying positive. Being better through reflection and response. An ongoing beautifully evolving process. Thank you.
    Shandra
    Tweet to: @shandra_lee #WithHeartWideOpen

    Reply to this comment
  5. Alex

    25. Jun, 2013

    I’ve seen the opposite of what you coached your client Lolly. My company create many problems for itself because I believe leadership has a “What-about-me?” mentality. Many problems have arisen, clients drop out, and my director has mentality and physically checked out.
    I would love your client to lead our company out of this rut. (Luckily, I’m moving on up and out)

    Reply to this comment
    • lollydaskal

      26. Jun, 2013

      I understand from the short story that I told you would say that. In this circumstance knowing the leader very well. I feel it was the best solution for him and his organization. Things have turned around for him which is always great to see.
      He is more creative and innovative then ever before…

      …..it is essential that the mind and the body and the business become motionless sometimes.

      THE GIFT OF BEING PRESENT.

      Lolly

      Reply to this comment
  6. Frank Sonnenberg

    25. Jun, 2013

    Great post Lolly.

    The three areas that I find so critical are: “Focus, Do Better, and Don’t do it alone.” Focus ➤ Organizations often get into trouble when they try to be all things to all people. Focus is key! Do Better ➤ One of the advantages of “hitting a wall” is that it enables you to think and view things differently. This new perspective will lead you to the next level of greatness. Don’t do it alone ➤ When you seek input from your people, you’re creating buy-in. It’s one thing to provide a directive and another to gain the commitment and loyalty of the folks who work with you.

    Great post Lolly. Thanks for sharing!

    Reply to this comment
    • lollydaskal

      26. Jun, 2013

      Thanks Frank,
      For stopping by means a lot to me.

      I REALLY like what you stated…
      When you seek input from your people, you’re creating buy-in. It’s one thing to provide a directive and another to gain the commitment and loyalty of the folks who work with you.

      So true!

      So very important.

      HAVE A GREAT DAY.
      Lolly

      Reply to this comment
  7. Christin

    25. Jun, 2013

    In today’s world, it is easy to be so busy that you accomplish a lot of nothing. Mindfulness is a way to connect action with intention, and a good way to make the most of the destination as well as the journey. Thanks for the reminder to stay in the moment!

    Reply to this comment
    • lollydaskal

      26. Jun, 2013

      Mindfulness is the way to connect, you are so right.

      I find when we connect we flow.
      when we flow with whatever happens
      and we let our mind rest.
      we can stay centered by accepting whatever we are meant to do.

      That is the gift of being present.

      Thanks for stopping by.

      Lolly

      Reply to this comment
  8. Karin Hurt

    26. Jun, 2013

    I find yoga and running a very important way for me to stay focused in the present. In one job, I had 15 Direct Reports and a 2000 person organization. I found it tough to really focus on what each leader needed from me at any given time. I developed a daily yoga practice where I spent time thinking about each of my leaders, their challenges and what they needed most from me. A few minutes spent reflecting on each one, as I went through my yoga practice really grounded me for the day. I was able to show up better to help them. Hmmm… now that I think of it, I should probably get back in that habit. Namaste.

    Reply to this comment
    • lollydaskal

      26. Jun, 2013

      Yoga it is… it sounds like it really grounded you.

      And that is the whole magic of BEING PRESENT.

      Being grounded in self to have energy for whatever life brings on.

      Thanks Karin for sharing.

      Lolly

      Reply to this comment
  9. Mark Ellis

    26. Jun, 2013

    Love this – listening is a forgotten skill in the modern, busy world. Focusing on someone absolutely, not thinking of yourself and visibly listening is one of the simplest and easiest gifts you can give.

    Reply to this comment
    • lollydaskal

      26. Jun, 2013

      Thanks Mark!

      Its the simplest and the hardest all at the same time.

      But we must practice. practice. practice.

      Lolly

      Reply to this comment
    • lollydaskal

      26. Jun, 2013

      By coming back to the present moment you return the exterior to the interior, from the time to the timeless, and from diversity to inclusion.

      Reply to this comment
    • lollydaskal

      26. Jun, 2013

      We are so busy doing we do not slow down. We must slow down so we can speed up.

      Reply to this comment
  10. David O'Brien

    26. Jun, 2013

    Hi Lolly,

    Thank you for another inspiring post. It reminds me of a quote I heard several years ago; “each of us has the capacity to quiet the mind, enter the silence, and know” Not sure who it came from but it serves me well when I’m feeling distracted.

    Reply to this comment
    • lollydaskal

      26. Jun, 2013

      I love the quote!

      “each of us has the capacity to quiet the mind, enter the silence, and know”

      it is so true!

      thanks so much for sharing!

      Lolly

      Reply to this comment
  11. Ed Fernandez

    26. Jun, 2013

    I spend too much time sometimes on those two great eternities.. The past… and the future… I am learning to be more mindful of the present moment, which is, incidentally all we really have.. It is good to look at the past and learn from it, but look at it as in a rear view mirror driving forward… It is also good to plan for the future… but our feet are planted in the now.. That is were we need to be… Present.
    Thanks for sharing Lolly!

    Reply to this comment
    • lollydaskal

      26. Jun, 2013

      You are right Ed.

      We need to be present. That is all we have.

      Thanks so much for sharing your insight with us.

      It truly helps to share wisdom.

      We can all learn from each other.

      Lolly

      Reply to this comment
  12. Maren Showkeir

    26. Jun, 2013

    Huzzah! Presence is so lacking in this world of too much to do, not enough time to do it. We can’t change the past, we can’t predict the future. But through practices (I’m an advocate of yoga) we can develop the habit of being present.

    Presence truly is a gift, and the only one that is always available to give to anyone. Best of all, it’s free.

    Reply to this comment
    • lollydaskal

      26. Jun, 2013

      You are so right!!!!!!!!!

      Presence truly is a gift, and the only one that is always available to give to anyone. Best of all, it’s free.

      Thanks for sharing.

      Lolly

      Reply to this comment
  13. Bill Benoist

    26. Jun, 2013

    Hi Lolly,

    Great advice – especially about seeking help when needed.

    So often, when stress is at a peak, all we can see is the tree in front of us and not the path ahead. Those are the times we need someone to help us see the situation from a helicopter point of view.

    Reply to this comment
    • lollydaskal

      27. Jun, 2013

      Seeking help is so important, it takes the energy or charge of feeling alone.

      Thanks Bill for stopping by and adding your wisdom.
      Appreciate you.

      Reply to this comment
  14. elainepinkerton

    27. Jun, 2013

    What an excellent thought for today (and always), Lolly. Being here now. It is simple and yet really profound—and sometimes it seems impossible. I find that when I walk or hike I’m brought back into the present and dealing with/enjoying/immersing myself in NOW. My mind loves to go out woolgathering in the past or future, but through conscious effort, as you point out, it’s possible to rope one’s mind back into the present. Thanks for being so inspiring and illuminating so beautifully! 🙂

    Reply to this comment
    • lollydaskal

      27. Jun, 2013

      Thanks Elaine for stopping by and sharing your insights with us.

      YOU have beautifully illuminated the gift of being PRESENT.

      Reply to this comment
  15. Julia Winston

    27. Jun, 2013

    Great points!
    Zoom In: This is a discipline because when things are going haywire it is hard to remember that “your who is not your do”. It is worth the pursuit because beating yourself up about how you got there or what others are saying you only leaves you beaten down. In difficulty you need to rise a little above to see a clear path out.

    Reply to this comment
  16. Dan

    27. Jun, 2013

    What is beautiful about this post, Lolly, is how supportive and redemptive your advice is for the person who is suffering. That person might be me or you or anybody. There’s something kind of angelic in the reminder that right now is what we’ve got. You probably know that quotation from the Dalai Lama that speaks so eloquently to that point:

    “There are only two days in the year that nothing can be done. One is called yesterday and the other is called tomorrow, so today is the right day to love, believe, do and mostly live.”

    Reply to this comment
  17. dawoodchishti

    27. Jun, 2013

    Lolly,
    Your words whisper and instigate passion.
    Love you and your fascinating expression.
    Permit them to chat with me!

    Reply to this comment
  18. Blair Glaser

    27. Jun, 2013

    Hi Lolly! Your gift of a post has echoed with me this week. I had some business to attend to tonight, but when I let the dog out, instead of rushing back to it, I explored the summer eve with her. The incredible smells, the warm air, the soft dusk light and the fireflies fortified my breath and filled my heart with gratitude.
    For me the art of being present is a practice and a discipline.
    Discipline is a forceI have been so fortunate to cultivate a friendship over the years. What a trustworthy, reliable and generous friend.

    Reply to this comment
  19. Rick Miller

    30. Jun, 2013

    Great post. Developing insight is an integral, yet often overlooked, element of great leadership. Without it, the disconnection between leader and team can create an impasse.

    Reply to this comment
  20. dawoodchishti

    30. Jun, 2013

    Stay calm; Focus deep,
    Me zoom in; Don’t find alone.
    Me is witness; Be Witness.
    We do it better; Lolly.

    Reply to this comment
  21. dawoodchishti

    02. Jul, 2013

    Sweet dream; Got your presence.

    Reply to this comment
  22. dawoodchishti

    02. Jul, 2013

    Your comments please!

    Reply to this comment
  23. Tracey

    15. Nov, 2016

    The lack of being present can breed for missed opportunity.

    Reply to this comment
  24. marc zazeela

    22. Dec, 2016

    Well done, Lolly. This moment is the most important time of your life. The past is done and cannot be changed. The future is not here and may not happen.

    Dale Carnegie used to say that 99% of the things that people worry about, never happen. Plan for the future, don’t worry about it.

    Reply to this comment
  25. Coach Barb

    14. Sep, 2017

    Great post! It resonated with me and the work that I do, thank you!

    Reply to this comment
  26. Phil

    06. Oct, 2017

    In this day and age where stress and depression are all around us, this post is one of many that can help an individual to go on and be strong. Thanks Lolly and nice post.

    Reply to this comment

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